A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, pal. You're obviously drunk."©JOKEDEMO.COM

Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"©JOKEDEMO.COM

Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go."©JOKEDEMO.COM

Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness, I thought I was a cripple."