Are you considering having children? To determine whether you are truly prepared for the experience, we suggest you take this set of simple tests...©JOKEDEMO.COM

MESS TEST:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flower bed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer. ©JOKEDEMO.COM

TOY TEST:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos. (If Legos are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream (this could wake a child at night).©JOKEDEMO.COM

GROCERY STORE TEST:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.©JOKEDEMO.COM

DRESSING TEST:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.©JOKEDEMO.COM

FEEDING TEST:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor. ©JOKEDEMO.COM

NIGHT TEST: ©JOKEDEMO.COM

Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 to 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 PM. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 AM. Set alarm for 5:00 AM. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for five years. Look cheerful.©JOKEDEMO.COM

PHYSICAL TEST (WOMEN)©JOKEDEMO.COM

Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10% of the beans.©JOKEDEMO.COM

PHYSICAL TEST (MEN):©JOKEDEMO.COM

Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.©JOKEDEMO.COM

FINAL ASSIGNMENT:©JOKEDEMO.COM

Find a couple who already have a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.