'Twas the night before Christmas,
Da whole house was mella
Not a creature was stirrin',
Cuz I had a gun unda my pilla.©JOKEDEMO.COM

When up on da roof
I heard somethin' pound,
I sprung to da window,
To scream, "YO! Keep it down!"©JOKEDEMO.COM

When what to my
Wonderin' eyes should appear,
But da Don of all elfs,
And eight friggin' reindeer!©JOKEDEMO.COM

Wit' slicked back black hair,
And a silk red suit,
Don Santa wuz here,
And he brought all da loot!©JOKEDEMO.COM

Wit' a slap to dare snouts,
And a yank on dare manes,
He cursed and he shouted,
And he called dem by name.©JOKEDEMO.COM

"Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,
Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,
Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!"©JOKEDEMO.COM

As I drew out my gun
And hid by da bed,
He flew troo da winda
And slapped me 'side da head.©JOKEDEMO.COM

"What da hell you doin'
Pullin' a gun on da Don?
Now all you're gettin' is coal,
You friggin' moron!"©JOKEDEMO.COM

Den pointin' a fat finga
Right unda my nose,
He twisted his pinky ring,
And up da chimney he rose.©JOKEDEMO.COM

He sprang to his sleigh,
Obscenities screamin',
Away dey all flew,
Before he troo dem a beatin'©JOKEDEMO.COM

Den I heard him yell out,
What I did least expect,
"Merry Friggin' Christmas to all,
And yous better show some respect!"