Never trust a dog to watch your food. Patrick, Age 10©JOKEDEMO.COM

When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents. Matthew, Age 12©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching. Andrew, Age 9©JOKEDEMO.COM

Wear a hat when feeding seagulls. Rocky, Age 9©JOKEDEMO.COM

Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning. Stephanie, Age 8©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. Rosemary, Age 7©JOKEDEMO.COM

Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower. Lamar, Age 10©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never ask for anything that costs more than five dollars when your parents are doing taxes. Carrol, Age 9©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never bug a pregnant mom. Nicholas, Age 11©JOKEDEMO.COM

Don't ever be too full for dessert. Kelly, Age 10©JOKEDEMO.COM

When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer > him. Heather, Age 16©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never tell your mom her diet's not working. Michael, Age 14©JOKEDEMO.COM

Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat. Joel, Age 12©JOKEDEMO.COM

When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone. Alyesha, Age 13©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never try to baptize a cat. Laura, Age 13©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never spit when on a roller coaster. Scott, Age 11©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never do pranks at a police station. Sam, Age 10©JOKEDEMO.COM

Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving. Rob, Age 10©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what Your > mom told you to do. Hank, Age 12©JOKEDEMO.COM

Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand. Molly, Age 11©JOKEDEMO.COM

Listen to your brain. It has lots of information. Chelsey, Age 7©JOKEDEMO.COM

Stay away from prunes. Randy, Age 9©JOKEDEMO.COM

Never dare your little brother to paint the family car. Phillip, Age 13©JOKEDEMO.COM

Forget the cake, go for the icing. Cynthia, Age 8©JOKEDEMO.COM

Remember the two places you are always welcome - church and grandma's house. Joanne, Age 11