Lisa Maries Divorce Allegations Against Michael Jackson©JOKEDEMO.COM

Wouldn't drink beer, watch football and break wind with her during Thanksgiving with Mom at Graceland.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Refused her pleas for separate make-up mirrors.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Unwilling to try new things in bed...like her for instance.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Elephant Man bones...fine. Oxygen chamber for eternal youth...well okay. But what's with the Groucho head on Jayne Mansfield's body thing?©JOKEDEMO.COM

In all their months of marriage not once did he charter a jet to get her peanut butter sandwiches or fly a mime troupe in from France like Poppa did for Momma.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Had her favorite noses (June 1994 and September 1995) done over.©JOKEDEMO.COM

She was shocked to discover that the glittery uniforms were not actually part of any real military organization.©JOKEDEMO.COM

He started hanging out with Madonna's dancers to toughen up his image.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Everywhere you turn, Elizabeth Taylor's supporting you through some sordid allegation.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Stood in the way of her film career when he refused to bankroll her debut performance in 'Jailbait Rock', the story of her Mom and Dad's courtship.©JOKEDEMO.COM

The all-night Kool Aid and Twister marathons with his little friends left him too tired to do that 'hee-hee-hee' thing she fell in love with.©JOKEDEMO.COM

She felt pressured to buy hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of LaToya's Amway products for the sake of family peace.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Jermaine and Tito were constantly asking her why Elvis didn't have kids THEY could marry.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Swears she thought she was marrying Michael Keaton.©JOKEDEMO.COM

She grew tired of scouring every Chucky Cheese's within a 50 mile radius only to find him slumped over a table in yet another chocolate milk and Pez stupor.©JOKEDEMO.COM

He told her to "just beat it" one too many times.©JOKEDEMO.COM

He's a plain spoken "Hoosier", and she had clearly gone "Hollywood".©JOKEDEMO.COM

She wanted someone more like her father, and though he was already a pathetic parody of his former self, he was just unwilling to gain weight.©JOKEDEMO.COM

He kept forgetting to put the top back on the mascara.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Irreconcilable similarities.