What to not say to the nice policeman.©JOKEDEMO.COM

I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Aren't you the guy from the Village People?©JOKEDEMO.COM

Hey, you must've been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good Job!©JOKEDEMO.COM

I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.©JOKEDEMO.COM

I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Bad cop! No doughnut!©JOKEDEMO.COM

You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?©JOKEDEMO.COM

Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on Cops?©JOKEDEMO.COM

Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend's nightstand.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonald's?©JOKEDEMO.COM

I pay your salary!©JOKEDEMO.COM

So, uh, you on the take or what?©JOKEDEMO.COM

Gee, Officer! That's terrific! The last officer only gave me a warning, too!©JOKEDEMO.COM

Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.©JOKEDEMO.COM

I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other car around--that's how far ahead of me they are.©JOKEDEMO.COM

What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off my lap and got lodged between the brake pedal and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Hey, is that a 9mm? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum!©JOKEDEMO.COM

Hey, can you give me another one of those full body cavity searches?