Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-o to a tree.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly car payment is due.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Laughing helps. It's like jogging on the inside.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.©JOKEDEMO.COM

One day I shall burst my buds of calm and blossom into hysteria.©JOKEDEMO.COM

If you can remain calm, you just don't have all the facts.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Life's golden age is when the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car.©JOKEDEMO.COM

Eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse can happen to you the rest of the day!